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Cool MSN screen names, please add to the list
A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts
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A wise monkey never monkies with another monkey's monkey
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We came, we saw, we drank beer
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Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but milk do?
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No one tests the depth of a river with both feet
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3 words to ruin a guys ego. is it in??
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All things being equal, fat people use more soap.
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By the time you read this, you've already read it
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If you don't stand for something, you will fall for everything
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Don't drink and drive. You might spill your beer
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I'm more drunk than a three-legged chicken on a wet patch of ice!
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Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
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We all smile in the same language
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He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically challenged.
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He who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs
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I Haven't Lost My Mind, It's Backed Up On Disk Somewhere.
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There are no stupid questions, just stupid people
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I'm better than normal, I'm abnormal!
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I don't have to be careful, I've got a gun
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Time is what keeps things from happening all at once
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If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
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If marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws
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Opinions are like assholes... Everyone's got one, and they stink
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Hard work never killed anybody, but why take chances
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If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
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Life's a beach... Surf it up!
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Man who sit on tack get point!
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Mind like a steel trap - rusty and illegal in most states.
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He who laughs last probably does not get the joke
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Mom + Dad + beer - condom = me
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Not me, not now, maybe later...
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I'm not going to change who I am for other people.
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Life's a bitch. Be its pimp
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Your Heart Breaks For Something You'll Never Have.
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Revenge is a dish that should be served cold.
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A true friend knows everything bout you......and is still your friend
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Hot heads and cold hearts never solved anything.
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Do you wish people to think well of you? Don't speak well of yourself.
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Life isn't weird: it's just the people in it.
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How much of human life is lost in waiting
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We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.
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Quick guys get tired; big guys don't shrink.
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Pain is no longer pain when it is past.
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A man of pleasure is a man of pains.
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When pain can't bless, heaven quits us in despair.
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Love fails, only when we fail to love.
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Where there is great love there are always miracles.
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Loves conquers all things except poverty and toothache.
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Once upon a time I was falling in love, but now I’m only falling apart...
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You love to hate the one who loves the one you hate to love.
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For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
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A wounded heart can with difficulty be cured.
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When god made me, he was just showin off!
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Caution: I'm mental! communicate with me at ur own risk!
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I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
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I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
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The earth swarms with people who are not worth talking to
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I find nothing more depressing than optimism.
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I Don’t Like The Drugs, But The Drugs Like Me
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I'm better than normal, I'm abnormal!
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Only little boys and old men sneer at love.
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9 out of 10 times you don't know what the fuck you're talking about
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